Jul 20, 2009 by Jenny
Crazy Boies.
David Boies, one of the attorneys who brought the federal lawsuit to overturn California’s Prop. 8, argues his case in an opinion piece in today’s WSJ.
It’s always intriguing when someone who is an expert in policy denies the obvious, but Boies claims that there is no legitimate state policy underlying the one-man, one-woman definition of marriage. It’s not obvious, apparently, that marriage is The. Social. Institution. most responsible for the flourishing of the human species for the few thousand years of civilization for which we have record.
He also writes that the “occasional suggestion that marriages between people of different sexes may somehow be threatened by marriages of people of the same sex does not withstand discussion.”
He’s right—it doesn’t withstand discussion; it’s a tiresome argument and a ridiculous suggestion. Our opposition to redefining marriage goes way beyond any one couple’s relationship—heterosexual or homosexual. We are concerned at the prospect of generations raised in a world in which we’ve decided that the intentional detachment of children from the mother and father who together made them is good, just and lawful.
As is true of others, Boies promotes the redefinition of marriage to meet a need for which it is entirely unsuited—the affirmation of gay and lesbian relationships. The majority of Americans resist the redefinition of marriage not to hurt individuals or their relationships, but to support the one family structure which inherently provides our most flourishing family structure for children.
More later perhaps about marriage as “figurative and literal gay-bashing.”
I am very pleased to see FOF starting the DriveThru blog. Already I see that you have some great comments and questions from those in favor of redefining marriage.
I encourage you to be valiant for the truth and let not mercy and truth forsake you: bind them about your neck; write them upon the table of you heart.
It’s so refreshing to see that this blog does not censor opinions that are counter to its own agenda. Many other anti-equality sites and blogs simply filter out any dissenting or critical responses, with the purpose of creating the illusion that all who visit the site agree with them.
However I believe this site will follow that route soon enough, as the counter-opinions here are more numerous, more logical, and more in sync with basic standards of human decency than either this site’s opinion or its supporters. Nevertheless, thank you for letting our voices be heard, however briefly.
I could bring up those old arguments about childless couples or single parents or blended families, but this isn’t about kids. It’s not about the underpinnings of civilization either. This isn’t even about morality and faith, it’s about dollars and cents: It’s about contracts and wills and property rights and powers of attorney and healthcare benefits. It’s about me deciding who I want to make medical decisions for me if the unthinkable happens and not allowing bureaucrats to limit my choice. Mostly, it’s about my partner and I getting all of these things through the simple, relatively inexpensive act of a civil MARRIAGE.
In its narrowest scope, marriage is a contract between two people. In its widest scope, marriage is a contract with society (family, community, congregation, governments).
While it may not necessarily engender children, marriage does engender changes: property, taxation, budgets, insurance policies (home, auto, health), identity (a new family name), how one is counted in a census, how one is treated by one’s entourage, etc. In that “etc.” is the “affirmation” of their love and devotion. Affirmation of love and devotion for same-sex couples is no more a “ridiculous suggestion” than affirming the love and devotion of a newly-wed elderly straight couple.
Affirmation of gay and lesbian relationships as equal to all others is indeed the goal. Achieving that goal will improve society at large by providing stability, respect, and honor for same-sex couples. The ensuing visibility has a POSITIVE impact on all families. It has a positive impact on children growing up in hetero- and in homo- households. All families benefit. 3 to 10% of all children are not heterosexual. They will grow up to be different regardless of what their parents do (or don’t do). Having affirming role models will be GOOD for them, good for you, good for me, good for all society. In no way would it have a negative impact on families or society.
If you are, as you say “concerned at the prospect of generations raised in a world in which we’ve decided that the intentional detachment of children from the mother and father who together made them is good, just and lawful” then I believe you would work a lot harder at creating legislation that would ban divorce. It is clear that the same christians who wish to prevent loving same-sex couples from enjoying the benefits of a CIVIL marriage are also ripping their own children from the “mother and father who together made them” at an alarming rate. Barna’s research indicates that conservative christians divorce at a much higher rate than liberal christians, atheists, and agnostics. Why is FOF so worried about the 6-10% of the population that might pursue same-sex marriage while ignoring the crisis within their own peer group?
re: Barna research and divorce rates
Research conducted more recently demonstrates a difference between evangelical Christian couples who practice their faith together (as demonstrated through regular church attendance), and those who simply identify themselves as evangelical Christians. The divorce rate is dramatically lower for those Christian couples who practice their faith regularly.
Here is a quote from Brad Wilcox’s research, and a link to the posted summary of his research document:
Notwithstanding recent reports to the contrary,[5] religious Americans enjoy happier and more stable marriages than their peers who are secular or only nominally affiliated with a religious tradition. My analysis of the GSS (2000–2006) indicates that both married men and women aged 18 to 55 who attend religious services regularly (several times a month or more) have happier marriages—though the influence of churchgoing appears to be markedly stronger for married men (see figure 1).
http://center.americanvalues.org/?p=75
This is a partisan group. Their research is automatically suspect. Where are your stats from an independent group to prove this?
Daniel,
If you’re referring to the research about the lowered divorce rates of religiously-involved married couples, the Institute for American Values was a good place to reference the study. The research was conducted by Brad Wilcox, a sociologist at the University of Virginia. As far as I know, there aren’t a lot of researchers looking at the effects of religious practice on marriage stability, but according to his bio on the UVA Web site, this is a specific area of research for Wilcox.
“We are concerned at the prospect of generations raised in a world in which we’ve decided that the intentional detachment of children from the mother and father who together made them is good, just and lawful.”
This makes it sound as if gay marriage advocates are planning on attempting to separate heterosexual parents from their children. Keeping in mind that gay people can already be parents, either with children from heterosexual relationships or via adoption (where it’s allowed…), how is legalising gay marriage going to ‘detach’ any children from their biological mothers and fathers?
“We are concerned at the prospect of generations raised in a world in which we’ve decided that the intentional detachment of children from the mother and father who together made them is good, just and lawful.”
While I agree with you that the idea of children being detached from the mother and father who made them is a tragedy that falls upon the shoulders of too many children in this country.
However, the unfortunate reality is that children are often born to parents who cannot support them. Foundling hospitals and group homes for children without parents are nothing new to Western civilization. Can you honestly say that you would rather children grow up with no parents at all rather than to be adopted by people who will make good and loving parents for them, even if the two parents happen to be of the same sex?
Surely two stable parents are a better option than being shuttled between foster homes, only to be turned out once you hit 18.
Clearly, the opposition here is not to marriage equality, but for gay adoption. That you’d rather children grow up with no parents at all is a sad and telling realization of how far FoF has strayed from its original, beautiful purpose. We are all trying to create the strongest families possible, and I only hope someday that our Christian brothers and sisters will one day see the light on this heartfelt truth.
For the thousands of years of marriage I don’t think there have ever been such vicious assaults on its principles. Undermining these principals can only lead to one thing: Complete abandonment of Biblical morals.
Keep on doing your thing. Others may be against you but it’s a worthy cause. For every person such as Mr. Boies, there is a good fighter like you. Fighting for what is right is always worthy.
Same-sex couples don’t consider marriage equality to be a redefinition but rather an extension of the right to marry to couples who have been barred from legal participation in the institution. In Massachusetts for example, traditional marriages between one man and one woman continue to be just that? Unless I’m missing something profound, those marriages are not suddenly redefined. Can you explain why you use the term redefinition rather than extension?